Many people remember the instant it happens. And nothing is ever the same. The sun is brighter. Mr. Bluebird lands on your shoulder because you're just so darned happy. You've become so annoying that your closest friends are actually plotting Mr. Bluebird's untimely demise. And that’s a sure sign that you are head over heels… Continue reading Rules of Engagement
Tag: a real mother
Cell Phone Addict
When I was a kid and the phone would ring during dinner, my mom would glare at the harvest gold wall mount and yell, “DON’T answer it!” She’d then lower her voice. “Pretend we’re not home,” she’d whisper as if the caller could hear her. According to Mom, there was an appropriate time and place… Continue reading Cell Phone Addict
50 Shades of A Real Mother
The 50 Shades of Grey Trilogy, written by E.L. James, has become a worldwide phenomenon. This series continues to reach unprecedented sales milestones that suggest every man and woman on the planet currently owns a copy. The craze started for the self-published James thanks to friends telling friends and ebooks – where women could simply… Continue reading 50 Shades of A Real Mother
Shakin’ off the Earworm
In the past decade, the field of neuroscience has produced amazing scientific breakthroughs. Researchers have learned how to control micro RNA, help individuals achieve impulse control, and change behavior with non-invasive brain stimulation. Recently, two MIT scientists successfully implanted a memory that NEVER HAPPENED into a mouse’s brain. But despite all these incredible advances, I’m… Continue reading Shakin’ off the Earworm
Axe the Axe
Santa, dear Santa It’s that time of year But you showing up Is now my biggest fear I’m not being critical Of the stuff that you bring In fact, I’ll tell you It’s only one thing Santa, you know I don’t mean to be mocking But last time you left… Continue reading Axe the Axe
Thanksgiving Envy
With mere hours to go on the Turkey Day countdown, you’ve probably checked most items off your official Food Network Thanksgiving Planning To-Do List. Yeah, me neither. According to the Food Network guide, my menu should have been planned one month in advance. That’s ridiculous - mine has been planned for much, much longer -… Continue reading Thanksgiving Envy
Yakasses on a Plane? Say it Ain’t So!
We’re less than a week away from the busiest time of the year in air travel – the Christmas holiday season. According to the American Air Trade Industry, between December 17 and January 6, 15 million people will line up for their pre-flight TSA grope. And if the FCC gives the green light, those 15… Continue reading Yakasses on a Plane? Say it Ain’t So!
Give me fitness. Give me abs. Give me a Hawaii Chair.
Experts say it takes three weeks to turn a new behavior into a habit. So if my past experience is a predictor, at two weeks into my New Year’s fitness regime I’m going to be, well, bored. Cardio intervals? Yawn. Core fitness? Zzzzzz. Eat less, exercise more? What-EVER. Give me gimmicks. Give me fads. Give… Continue reading Give me fitness. Give me abs. Give me a Hawaii Chair.
Is A Baby Sister Really Too Much To Ask For?
My youth was idyllic. My days were drama-free. It was so darned peaceful that Mr. Bluebird occasionally landed on my shoulder to whistle a cheerful tune. I never heard those words so frequently uttered by Country Squire station wagon driving dads on family roads trips: “DON’T make me pull this car over!” But my childhood… Continue reading Is A Baby Sister Really Too Much To Ask For?
Maternal Instinct
Some women are born to be mothers. Then there’s me. The tell-tale signs of my lack of maternal instincts started at a tender age. While other girls fussed and cooed over their plastic baby dolls, I cut all the hair off mine and left it naked in the backyard in the rain for five days.… Continue reading Maternal Instinct